You have all been very patient and kind with me as I have blabbed on about having to have a tube with a camera attached go up my nose and down my throat to find some unidentified object. I decided that it would be best since you have all become so near and dear to me to simply lay my concern on the table...I'm worried that they will find a lifelong stash of peanut M&M's hiding behind my right tonsil. There I've said it! Like some hamster, what if my treats have been stacking up when I was unaware of it and my toothbrush and flossing and even mouthwash that could take the chrome off of the toaster has been unable to dislodge the stash of snackage that I am now completely convinced is there?
Am I crazy? Well HELL YES I'm crazy! That has never been in question. The question is why would I let myself go there? SHAME! We collect shame like a hamster hoards his seeds in his pouches. We have discussed shame before. So now let's discuss it in the context of letting go.
It is important to understand here in the middle of our daily bit of jocularity that I feel a responsibility to share honestly. I am an energy worker. A Reiki Master. I work with energy all of the time and part of what I do (and if you are unfamiliar with the above, it would be fun for you to Google the thing, it's cool stuff) is graciously and with reverence move energy through others that no longer serves them so that the cleaner and more positive energy of love and balance and a return to your true self can be in place. A bit like a reset button. This bit is significant because those of us who do what I do always understand that when there is a physical illness, inconvenience, dis-ease etc., we always take a peek at what is going on energetically, personally, spiritually, emotionally with the one having the concern. After all we are all MIND, BODY AND SPIRIT. So for me...sigh...I have to look in the mirror.
It has become evident that I have an opportunity to see where in my world that I am hoarding anger, resentment, self-sabotage and a biggie for me, indecisiveness. When I use the word opportunity I mean it. There are any number of options available to us that we utilize on a regular basis. We berate ourselves for tasks undone, issues unresolved and resentment stored.
I would like to propose a different way. I will be the sacrificial hamster, guinea pig if you will. I am going to put on some nice soothing music and sit quietly and see inside my Spirit. I will not be impatient with this process I will wait until I feel truly connected. Then I will ask if there are past hurts, bits of confusion that are stored inside my very soul like an adorable well meaning hamster would store his stash of corn kernels. If so, I will gently and with Grace ask that they remove themselves immediatley and take off for the nearest trash receptacle. I will continue this process while I pay particular attention to how I am treating my body. I will remind myself gently like I would remind my best friend that all information is good information and that I am proud of me for starting where I am.
Find your stash of hoarded negative energy. Take it to the trash like you do everything else that no longer serves you. Be gentle with yourselves. You are loved beyond measure.
A big hug to all of you!
p.s. A BIG SHOUT OUT to the Netherlands! 40 folks from Venlo! I looked you up and it is a lovely place. Thanks for reading my blog posts. Also...Menlo Park, CA!
So pretty with much to see and do! Many happy memories visiting there when my daughter was attending a brass camp at Menlo College one summer. If memory serves...the college there is not only beautiful but has squirrels of unusual size. I admit to gasping a time or three when they would bound across the campus!