We need to find the courage to say NO to the things and people that are not serving us if we want to rediscover ourselves and live our lives with authenticity.
Barbara De Angelis
YIKES! That quote really brought me up short. Yet it is timely for many of us right now. In the cartoon I see myself on occasion. I have just agreed to do something that I know I don't have the time, energy or inclination to do. But I have said yes with a convincing level of enthusiasm even! Sheesh! Basically we bi-peds are a want to please kind of lot. We hate to say no, we abhor disappointing those who ask something/anything of us. Mostly we despise giving a "No, terribly sorry, I am unable," when a request simply does not resonate with us. Yet it is a skill that perhaps we can practice together so it won't seem so daunting hmmmm? I always say that if you are going to do something prickly, thorny, difficult it is best to gather those who are having a similar struggle and hold hands through the thing. Compare notes, chat it up, encourage the truth to be told gently to those who request our favors, assistance, time, energy, listening ears. We tend to paint ourselves into corners with respect to our time. In so doing, we do things, perform tasks and assist others without thought to the needs of ourselves. When that happens we become fragmented internally a bit and we are often unable to spend the quiet reflection we need to travel this path we walk. I am not suggesting that we be selfish. I know few truly selfish people. I do know brilliant folks who simply and graciously decline offers to assist, attend, bake, schlep boxes without explanation. These same enlightened individuals do much to help others but they do so in a manner that is authentic to them! They are my inspiration. I am suggesting that we assist in authentic ways. In the same way that we strive for authentic relationships we on occasion must release and let go of friendships and acquaintances that no longer serve us and place discord in our path where it is neither wanted, needed or necessary.
Let us be authentic in our responses to requests for assistance. Let us engage our whole heart in our times of holding out our energy and hands for another. This will grant lovely permission to others to behave similarly and in so doing we feel enriched by the integrity in our deep personal relationships and our casual friendship and day to day acquaintances.
And as we do? Yep, we all benefit. Especially the Universe.
And so it is.